Category: Parenting

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5 Timeless & Inexpensive Gift Ideas for Parents

Senior couple Harlen Miller, artist and author of “Slow Down Arthur, Stick to Thirty,” said, “Probably the reason we all go so haywire at Christmas time with the endless unrestrained and often silly buying of gifts is that we don’t quite know how to put our love into words.” The Christmas Season, as well as birthdays and anniversaries, are occasions of great joy, as well as frustration, especially when it comes to selecting gifts for the elderly.

While there is a plethora of gift ideas for young children, what-to-buy for parents is especially difficult for a few reasons

  • Parents often have the financial ability to buy what they want when they want it
  • Past gifts, as well as purchases, have been accumulated for decades – so much, in some cases, that there is little space for storage in their houses
  • Aging has diminished their physical or mental abilities to enjoy active participation or use complicated electronic gadgets
  • Gift givers may lack the time or inspiration to create an unusual gift or experience for their parents

As a card-carrying member of the AARP Generation, I understand the dilemma of my children seeking gifts to please me or my spouse. However, I can also attest that the gifts I’ve treasured the most over the years were not the most expensive, or even available from a store, but were crudely made ashtrays, hand-painted pictures, or special moments of time and togetherness given in love. Simple, often inexpensive gifts that say “I love you” or “I remember the good times” are the ones that will be kept and revisited year after year.

Great Gifts for Parents From Adult Children

1. A Personal Letter from a Child or Grandchild

A handwritten, heartfelt letter from a child or grandchild is always appropriate and becomes more cherished as time goes by. Grammar and misspellings don’t matter; there is no grading and no critic who will review the contents for plot or accuracy. Simply recalling a time that was shared between child and parent, expressing how much enjoyment you felt, and thanking your parent or parents for that memory is enough to make it special.

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What Should You Tell Your Kids About Santa?

Santa Gets a Bear HugParents are often conflicted during the holidays when Santa Claus is ever-present in the media and community. Should the belief in an imaginary, mythical figure be encouraged? How will your child feel when he or she discovers the jolly figure in the red suit carrying a big bag of Christmas presents is not real?

While there are no definitive answers, the following information may help you make the right decision for you and your child.

The Development of Imagination

Between the ages of two and three, children begin developing imagination and engage in some form of play-acting or pretend. Most parents have experienced being served an imaginary meal, and few question whether the child actually believes the food is real.

Researchers agree that imagination is an essential tool children use to learn about things and people they don’t directly experience. Dr. Paul Harris of the Harvard Graduate School of Education says that imagination and role-play appear to have a key role in helping children understand someone else’s perspective: “Whenever you think about the Civil War or the Roman empire or possibly God, you’re using your imagination. The imagination is absolutely vital for contemplating reality, not just those things we take to be mere fantasy.”

Dr. Jacqueline Woolley at the University of Texas in Austin has conducted a number of child studies on imaginary or mythical characters such as Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny. Her research indicates that children as young as age three can distinguish between reality and fantasy, but lack the ability to accurately assess the difference when presented with available evidence. In other words, children learn by what they see, what they hear from others (testimony), and inference, the latter becoming more reliable as they grow older. Studies suggest that belief in Santa Claus begins around age three, peaks at about five, and declines thereafter, so that by nine, only a third of children still believe.

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How to Praise and Encourage Kids Appropriately for Success

fater and son studyingAs Dr. Madeline Levine, author of “Teach Your Children Well,” stated in a 2012 New York Times article, “The central task of growing up is to develop a sense of self that is autonomous, confident, and generally in accord with reality.” Unfortunately, many parents in their attempts to give their children self-esteem and psychological security overly praise their children and celebrate the completion of tasks that are ordinary and easy, effectively rewarding them for mediocre efforts. As a consequence, children develop a false sense of self-confidence and achievement, a facade of self-esteem that crumbles when they are challenged as teenagers and college students with potentially devastating consequences.

Teaching a child to succeed and achieve the potential of which they are capable is not just a matter of positive reinforcement, but includes giving them the tools to understand and appreciate the reality of genuine achievement. Parents need to realize that self-esteem does not lead to accomplishment, but that accomplishment leads to self-esteem. Children who understand that instances of adversity and stress are inevitable in every person’s life are going to become emotionally and socially intelligent adults who can recover from disappointments and move on with their lives.

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Relocating or Remodeling – Deciding Whether to Stay or Move

moving boxesHistorically, almost two-thirds of households in America live in a place they own. Homeownership is a key prong of the American dream, and according to a American Housing Survey by the U.S. Census Bureau, some 9 out of 10 Americans achieve it during their lifetime.

Also key to American homeownership is the notion of moving up – i.e., buying a home, living in it for a few years, then selling to reap the profit in order to purchase another property, either a higher-value place or one that better suits the owners’ current living situation. This was particularly popular in high-growth areas like California and Las Vegas. But that was before the recent economic downturn and a massive slump in housing prices. Now, the decision to sell your house and trade up is not as clear-cut as once thought, and owners are left wondering, Should we stay, or should we go?

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